1 post tagged “marriage”

I think one should not have to work up the nerve to go to church.  I'm going to ask to be taken off the nursery schedule after my shift today.  I have only gone to the current church that we attend on the days that I am scheduled ever since the service before Easter.  They should a montage of clips from the Pass1on of the Chr1st and it made me sick to my stomach.  I didn't see that movie when it came out for a reason.  I've almost always had a rough relationship with Christianity, but between my theology studies this past year and the stance that this church takes, I can't conceive of going there any longer.  I know that Frog will be upset, so I'll just add it to the laundry list of what I do (or don't do) that he dislikes, but I can't keep going someplace where I am uncomfortable.  I have no real problem with Frog and the kids attending, but I would probably be happier if the kids didn't get indoctrinated at this young age.  Compromise is the seat of marriage though so I'll suck it up.

Speaking of marriage, I believe that sometimes there are off years in a marriage.  I do not believe that marriage can be all butterflies and rose petals every single minute.  Maybe this is just because I'm not feeling that way now, but I think a little slack must be given to imperfect beings who have made a choice to stay together.  I just don't have anything left to give right now.  I am emotionally and physically exhausted from all of the events of the past 3 years. 

I have a summer break, with the kids, from school and I plan on puttering around the house, trying to get Bean ready for kindergarten, and giving Bug more personalized attention.  I also plan on getting comfortable riding my new Virago and possibly taking a ride later in the summer with some new biker friends.  I was supposed to bring my family to the 50th wedding anniversary of my paternal grandparents at the end of June.  I decided that it wasn't going to do anything except stress me out, and with the help of a family member who I adore, I realized that if I had knots in my stomach NOW about it then it probably wasn't going to get better by the time the trip rolled around.  Instead, Frog is going to a race in MD with some of his family next weekend, and I will travel out to Denver sometime in June or July to spend a few days with my family out there.  The mere idea of that trip makes me smile and want to start giggling!  I'm too tired to give what I don't have anymore.

In other news, I did graduate with my Associates degree this past month and I did it with a 4.0!  So add that to turning thirty this year and it's been a sort of big year.   If I could just lose the rest of my weight I would be pretty ecstatic.  As it is, I am very proud of myself and looking forward to the time away from school this summer.  I got accepted at the school I applied to so come this fall I will be a tiger!